Today marks 39 weeks. Wow. Some moments it seems like time has flown by and there are times when I feel like it’s never going to get here.
Throughout the past few weeks there have been several predictions about when Samuel would actually come. My doctor was out of town all of last week so several people figured Samuel would come at 38 weeks like Josiah did — while my doctor was on vacation. There were a few times when I thought that they were right. Now that we’re at 39 weeks we obviously know they were wrong.
Although it can change quickly, when I got checked at my last appointment to see if I was dilated my cervix was still closed and pretty high up. Josiah got impatient and decided he was coming out at 38 weeks no matter what…and I’m starting to get the feeling that Samuel has just decided he’s going to stay put until he absolutely has to come out.
I’m exhausted most of the time. Heck, I got up at 9:15 this morning, ate breakfast, stopped by the library and went to the doctor. I got home at 11:40, ate lunch and then went to go take a nap because I couldn’t keep my eyes open. Pretty much I’ve done nothing but sleep, eat, and have contractions. It’s pretty aggravating actually. I’ll have noticeable contractions that are able to be timed, but it never lasts for long. It’ll go on for an hour or so and then stop. Then it’ll start up again…it’s a big tease really.
At my appointment today the doctor asked me how big I thought Samuel was. My response was, “I don’t know…big. Bigger than Josiah.” He told me that there have been studies that show that women actually have a pretty good sense about how big or small their babies are going to be and that they tend to be pretty accurate. Of course it seems kind of obvious because I’m visibly bigger than before, I’m five pounds heavier than I was when I delivered Josiah (even though I started out at a lower pre-pregnancy weight this time), and Samuel at this point has stayed in a week longer.
I’ll go to the doctor on Monday, Feb. 10 — my due date — for one last appointment to get all the final details in line for the c-section and then on Tuesday, Feb. 11 — 8 days from now — I’ll be going in to deliver Samuel.
My body is 100% ready for Samuel to be here. Jimmi said he feels bad for me because I moan when I try to roll over in my sleep because of the amount of pressure and pain I have in my pelvis and the round ligament pain I have. I’m not sleeping well which is contributing to the exhaustion throughout the day.
However, there are moments that I think that I’m not quite ready for Samuel to be here. Yes, I’m pretty ready to have my body back and start exercising again and I’m ready to not be tired because of hormones (because we all know I’ll be tired for a different reason). I’m even ready to hold this sweet baby in my arms and love all over him. I remember though the title wave of feeling overwhelmed that first night after we brought Josiah home. At that point it is all real. No more cravings and pregnancy related sickness. Due to breastfeeding increased appetite and some hormones will still be there, but my body will slowly go back to normal.
It won’t be Jimmi, me, and Josiah anymore. And although it’s exciting it’s also going to be a huge adjustment…one that we’ve tried being prepared for, but that no one can ever fully be prepared for. As each day passes Josiah asks daily when Samuel is ready to be here and the anticipation builds for us all. I’m just preparing for that “wow” moment that will come when he finally gets here and we all realize how our life will be changed by this little baby boy we didn’t think we could have.